Key facts about remarriage
Mourning for the lost relationship with your former spouse
takes a minimum of 2 years and up to 5 years to complete, whether
that relationship was positive, negative or mixed. There is a mourning
process with a number of stages that take time to go through.
It's normal to be cautious about remarrying after having
experienced divorce. The truth is that those who remarry can have
a much better chance at success because they now understand the
need to be intentional about adopting marriage success strategies.
They know that love won't lead to 'everything working itself out'.
Unresolved feelings (including shame or guilt) about being
divorced are common, as are feelings and concerns about marrying
someone who has been divorced or otherwise lost a spouse.
Being divorced can affect your expectations about the potential
success of your new marriage in ways that you may not even be aware
Reactions to the remarriage of a former spouse (including
anger and grief) should be expected, even if you have already remarried
References and Reading:
E. Mavis Hetherington,
Ph.D. and John Kelly, For Better or For Worse: Divorce Reconsidered.
Part One of the book may be helpful in considering what went wrong
in a previous marriage. In Part Two, see chapter 8: Repartnering,
High Hopes & Crossed Fingers. The overall tone of this book
is positive and takes the view that divorce, while stressful and
confusing, is an opportunity for personal growth and a better life.
here to learn more about or buy this book through our bookstore
Couples who are remarrying
find that MST marriage preparation helps to address the special
challenges that remarriage can pose. MST includes an special optional
seminar section to help couples to specifically address remarriageissues.
MST functions as an immunization
that boosts your capacity to handle these potential difficulties.
It fortifies your marriage immune system by giving you an early
alert to potential areas of challenge and providing you with the
skills and opportunity to resolve and manage these challenges before
stress and conflict emerge.
If your remarriage involves
children from a previous relationship, see our Stepfamilies tips
MST pre-marriage preparation
seminars are designed to help couples build the skills and understanding
that they will need to succeed in remarriage. They'll also get help
to overcome all of the other issues that challenge couples in modern
marriage. MST is religion-neutral and based on the latest marriage
Don't wait for problems
to emerge, take preventive action to promote the happiness and success
of your marriage.
here to learn more about the benefits of marriage preparation.
here to learn about Marriage Success Training.
2003, Patricia S. & Gregory A. Kuhlman. You may copy this article
for non-commercial use provided that no changes are made and this
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